The South Has Risen Again!

After the success of The Mafioso's of New Jersey I wasn't sure Bravo had it in them to comeback so soon with the amazing hot mess that is the second season of the Skanks of Atlanta. Wow. The true housewives of Atlanta are definitely shuddering at the Junior League over chardonnays and grilled chicken salads - dressing on the side of course. If you are ready for some catching up pour yourself a 'Co Cola as they do in the South and have yourself a read:

It seems as if there has been a lot of downsizing this season. Three smaller homes for these women. Sheree's for her ex not making mortgage payments, Nene's for according to Kim - Greg's financial problems and Kim herself (while it was not shown) has been booted from the townhouse Big Poppa had set her up in. Really Sheree, you seriously did not know your ex was missing mortgage payments? No phone calls to you? No letters in the mail? No e-mails? You claim to be such a savvy business woman but you end up with an eviction notice? One word for you. Bullshit. I know if I am half a minute late with my Discover payment they are hounding me from all directions to pay up or they are going to take my first born, you knew those payments were not getting paid and you just did not care. As for Nene and Greg, going on Kim's word is as smart as asking Jennifer Aniston for dating advice but several internet sites during the hiatus have mentioned the same thing. While the Leeks' new "shack" is smaller I also think it is much classier and less ostentatious. Good move there. I just can't wait to see the finished product after Nene and Dwight get through decorating it ... There is some design show out there with Dwight's name on it - there is a new gay boy in town! I imagine Kim's new digs will be the typical white trash setting we have come to expect. You can take the girl out of the trailer but you can't take the trailer out of the girl!

Since Sheree's financial situation has already been brought up why is the dumb bitch spend a shitload of cash on her divorce - oh excuse me - INDEPENDENCE party? First you idiot, you are not independent of your ex, that is why you were evicted from your home. YOU COULD NOT AFFORD IT!!! Second, when Nene asked if you got your "7 figure settlement," you claimed on paper only and then said you "needed the money." Again, if you NEED the money - you are not independent. Third, are there really enough people who like you that will come to a party celebrating you? Maybe if you could come in on the helicopter and say you fell out of it to a stunning death or it crashed onto you after it dropped you off people would explode into spontaneous applause and cheers for you but otherwise woman I just don't see it happening anytime soon. Plus your being carried in Cleopatra style is nothing more than a rip-off of the movie "Coming to America." Which leads me to the subject of party planner Anthony - he should know shit like this. At least that what was running through my mind during their initial meeting. He seemed kind of arrogant and glib - not two of my favorite traits. After all, he is a professional party planner and people do expect the wild and unexpected, especially in Atlanta with the extremely hot hip hop scene of the past decade or so. But after the phone call when he hung up on her I put my on spin on the situation ... with editing I figured she had to have stalked him about 300 times and he was just fed up. Just a side note here -as she was bitching to her hair stylist did anyone else notice how badly her hair was smoking every time he used the flat iron? She was like a fuming dragon. Too funny. The office smack down was reminiscent of a Dynasty battle between Krystal and Alexis, Anthony even throwing in a "your mama." I cannot wait to see how this turns out. Sheree showed her true colors here and all that glitters is truly not gold. Anthony certainly was not professional and he looks like shit on T.V. promoting his business but I have a strong suspicion he would do it all over again after dealing with the SheDevil. He could team up with Dwight if business drops off because of the incident. Interior design/party planning/WWF fighting/personal shoppers.

I love Nene but instead of bed hopping she is the consummate friend hopper and I hope Lisa gets this since Lisa is the self proclaimed "nice one." Not only did Lisa get a new neighbor but it seems a new best friend as well. I wonder how this will bode for the newly unemployed Mr. Lisa who wants to spend time with his wife getting her pregnant. Not playing nicely with Nene is a no no, don't you know? Seeing Lisa, Ed and E.J. is always cute as they are the most normal of this group and I loved when Lisa was trying on the dress and Ed was her human bra! I have a funny feeling that we are not going to see her knocked up anytime soon ... she just does not seem too hip to the idea and Ed is way too big of a kid himself. Maybe if he gets picked up by another NFL team but not until then. Back to friend hopper Nene, the big reconciliation with the SheDevil. All I can say is it's about damn time but did NeNe really need to have Sheree apologize three times and try to force her to cry? Hey dumb shit ... do you want to start the feud all over again? LET IT GO ALREADY! Speaking of reconciliations - NeNe and Kim are supposed to have a glass of wine to clear the air. Yeah - as clear as the air after Chernobyl. Nor the idea brought up at Nicey Nash's party of NeNe, Sheree and Lisa meeting with Kim together. Yes and Sarah Palin, Hillary Clinton, John McCain and Barack Obama are all going to have a nice weekend of camping. You betcha.

Kim, I didn't like you last season, I still don't like you this season. In fact I despise you this season. Is it possible you seem even more worthless? So your visit to your psychic tells you of a possible child, a possible business venture, you are adrift from friends, your kids should be your priority and your married lover still wants you. Your reaction was you need to take your birth control pills and antidepressants, avoid Nene and Sheree, hug the girls and giggle about Big Poppa. You stupid stupid stupid skank. Anyone who watches the show could tell you the exact same thing. Except being the wonderful psychic I am, combine the kid with Big Poppa and that is your business venture ... child support! See how smart I am. You fucking moron. But nope, your big idea is to get into wigs for white women. Let me give you a tip - WHITE WOMEN DO NOT WEAR WIGS UNLESS THEY GO BALD! It is not part of our culture you dolt. Just because you think you are African-American, the majority of white women do not they are. And your line about not needing to know how to do any work because you will hire someone to do it just irked me to my inner core. If I ever see you in person, I will slap you silly. Count on it.

I am digging this Kandi chick so far. She seems like she has a lot that she can bring to the show and seems to have a good head on her shoulders. I liked the line about not buying diamonds but property instead. I just have a feeling she is going to be the one that calls "bullshit" when she sees it EXCEPT when it comes to her kid. Her being friends with Lisa is also going to show us a fun side of Lisa we've never seen. Hearing Lisa say she didn't want to be the sad boring vagina was priceless. I had never really realized before this episode but Lisa was really a "fringe" housewife not being a close friend to any of the others. I absolutely cannot wait until Kandi calls out Kim on the whole Dallas Austin record deal! It will make my day...

Until next week my friends, I will be working on my ODE TO A SHEDEVIL ... what will you be doing?

p.s. a great website to check out for latest news on all of the skanks is: www.realfauxhousewives.com